pros and cons of textiles

okay so, we have to choose our subjects by the end of this term. and im kinda iffy about textiles.

but i honestly don't know if i should choose textiles or not. I like it, it's one of my many passions but i never get praised about it. and it's not like i feed on compliments and shit but i want to know that im doing well. and i don't know anymore. we talked about all the textiles continuers and they're such competition. and then there's ann. Honestly i love her because she's a nice person but the way everyone treats her designs are so overated. it is lovely, but then everyone just goes 'woooow ann. woooooow it's so good. you should be a designer. blahblahblah' and it just makes me lose so much confidence. iunno why. i just lose hope that i would do well in there. 

i mean, someone could have goooood ideas but, if they can't draw freehand like her, would they be considered worst than her? 

iunno. i just lose so much confidence in my passion. i mean, for my costume, the only compliment that made me ohsohappy was karu who said that she liked the concept and thought that i put effort in it. i mean, if i have the passion but im not that good, what's the point? it's like someone who loves singing but can't sing. 

So here's my list of pros and cons:

Pros

• Doing something that i absolutely love and enjoy
• Being able to have a subject where i could relax and not do so much written stuff
• I'm comfortable with it and i found it a subject i know well

Cons:

• Good people that i have to 'compete' with. I don't want to be in the category of the 'others'
• It's really time wasting 
• You have to put lots and lots of effort into our majors
• it wastes quite a lot of money

The cons list totally outweighs the pros. i honestly don't know. i know that if i chose textiles i WILL DEFINITELY enjoy it to my best. but i have to try super hard. i know school is not always about competition and who's greater than who. but textiles is something i find that im good at compared to my other subjects, and it'll be great if i was able to show that to people and have people who understand and appreciate that. 

iunno.