im so done with english

my conclusion for fcking modernism summary has nothing to do with my body paragraphs..ughhh.

the next week is going to be so hectic. 
i have jason mraz on tuesday which i am excited to do to but also not because on wednesday i have a fcking chem exam for tutoring WHICH I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT BECAUSE I JOINED IN THE LAST 3 WEEKS OF THE TOPIC. 

so i gotta write notes for that. 

then i gotta do my english change narrative cause its due next tuesday. but next monday i have kristies, which i haven't even asked my parents if I could go yet and, looking at the situation right now, i dont think it's even possible to ask my dad because he's been going ANAL about everything I do. 

kay so last week was really hectic for me. Most of it was just trying to finish up my textiles and soon as possible as well and cruising slowly through work. and i really do mean SLOW. 
On thursday i had to stay back at school for textiles which was super tiring and mum thinks i'm dodgy now because i always come home late. I realise that almost every week I go home late at least once a week, which i pretty crazy for mum cause she thinks I have some toyboy or whatnot hahahas. 

friday went to lincraft in the city to find some dye BUT THEY FCKING RAN OUT. this is cray, how can lincraft run out of dye when literally no one buys them.

saturday- did nothing but wathced movies and did more satin stitching. i think this has been the least productive day so of the week so far i regretted it so much.

sab and matthew and dae went to the city to eat at pancakes but i was lazy so i didnt go. and when they came in the store matthew was like omg long time no see blahblah shoulve gone pancakes balhablh. no. i don't have time hahahs.

 work was fun because my friends i havent work with for ages came by cause we had a mini staff concert- with the exception of this crazily talented singer who asked to come play AS WELL AS my friend Sam who was gonna propose to his girlfiend. so a bunch of new staff came in and we started blowing balloons and prep up and this was when i felt awks cause i've never worked with them before and they're all koreans and talking korean and i'm like "meeeeep, don't know you people." so i stuck to sally and julia- who's singining with the shorter sam and i don't even know her well but shes so cute.  me and daehyun- who dressed up as a rabbit- had to go give balloons to all the people in the square and i realise how popular he is in the stra community cause all these stra boys came up to us and started teasing him and shit. 

SAM PROPOSED. and it was really cute cause everyone came and even some customers stayed to watch and his gf was all giddy and sdlkfjsldkjflsdkjf so romantic he was only going to play two songs and then he did a surprise one and dae, in his rabbit suit, pulled sam's gf up on stage and sam was all wooing her with his buttery voice and then he proposed and everyone's like "KISS KISS KISS" and asldkjasdjaljsd so romantic me and sab were like omg our bfs have to do that to us in the future. 

afterwards everyone went home and the day was pretty chill. we totally relaxed even under the cameras and me and dae finally got passed the awkward stage- that took like 3 shifts hahahas-. definitely the longest warming up i had to do with someone because we would talk to each other normally but it would just be very brief but  now we're like teasing each other and shit. yaaay don't need to be awks anymore. 

idk like sometimes i feel annoyed that i only work one shift casue i don't get to meet many people- those 3 people are the only ones i work with- but in a way im pretty grateful cause we're a pretty close bunch. i've seen people who work together but aren't comfortable but we go out and eat with each other and prep together so yeah, all gee. 

cept today day threatened me to quit. again. ugh i don't think he understands that this is like my only hobby i don't do sports anymore and i don't want to be some lazy ass who spends her days at home 24/7. at least i'm getting money, a social life, and a little exercise running around the place. i honestly don't ask for much since i had to quit basketball cause he was tired driving me there and home and all i'm going to now is fcking school and chem tutoring. 

fck this i'm tired already why make things more complicated. 

42 words into modern summary

After 1 hour of working
Strong/10
:(

so guess what

i did lose my phone on the bus. 
the man called my mum today and told her he found it. on the bus. 
and i was like hah, i told you i was 100% sure it was on the bus but you didn't bother looking and now you see it. it would be better for both sides if you fcking bothered to check when i asked you to cause now it saves you the money of sending it to the school and saves me money from buying a new phone. gah. :( 

good stuff

Esta- Parables (Jenny Suk flip)

So i lost my phone

Fcking life im losing everything every week.
Would not be surprised if i lose my bag next week since i have lost my id, my train ticket, my bus ticket and now a phone in less than 2 weeks.

LEESS THAN 2 WEEKS. This is the most stupid, ignorant, and clumsy ive been in my whole lifespan.

got faith in your and i, so put your pretty little hands in mine

Trails And Ways - Sure Thing (Miguel Cover)

i always wonder if you ever feel the same way that i do right now- hurt and disappointed. 

sometimes i feel like you moved on so quick but i'm stuck in the same position. 

i still think of you. small things like songs and movies and tv shows that we've talked about. these things tick me off and i go through a state of melancholy thinking about you and how we used to love each other. 

do you ever feel the same way that i do? do you ever listen to music and think of me or even eat food that we've talked about and remember the times we had? 

i feel like such an idiot for still holding onto the past but i miss you. cause for the time you were the only thing i had. i thought that it should be me who would move on first since i was the one that ended it but i'm stuck in this static position. i can't go on facebook without thinking of you, couldn't look through my phone without wondering what you're doing. but you're so dead on the other side. and it makes me wonder why i'm still holding on to something that i didn't want and something that would never be mine. 

why

fuck you travis garland. why do you have to tease me like this, give me a stream and not let me download it. can't wait this long seriously.